It's almost that time of year again

It's almost that time of year again, where you can reflect back and see what you have achieved.

Tomorrow I'll be 22, the big TWO-TWO, and it would make me.......well, 22.

I'm expecting this year to be a mellow, perhaps no celebration, perhaps no remembrance. I assume I'm just the guy you see when you walk to class, or the guy you see when you don't know really hard English words. I was never the guy people came to for thick and thin. I never had a best friend, nor I think I would have one in the future. I will still be that guy who's gonna stay at home over the weekend, waking up late, watching the TV and eventually die lonely.

Right. Review of my goals.

To be honest, I am a very simple guy who wants simple things in life. I don't care if I have millions of money in my bank account, or if I live in a 2 bedroom apartment with 10 people. All I wanted was for somebody to love and to cherish.

With all my accomplishments so far, securing a job and shit. I deem my year of 21 unsuccessful. Because I lost the only thing that can make me happy. And whats worst than that, is that I have lost the will to love. I'm not sure if anyone can replicate what we had before, and I sure pity the next person I fall in love with, because she won't receive the same amount that you have.

I'm getting teary eyed with this. Dah la, benda dah lepas, buat apa ko nak pegang lama-lama kan?

My birthday wish for this year, is that I wish to move on. I wish to love myself more than I love another person. And I wish I won't be as weak as I was before. Please grant me that Ya Rabb.